Religion

The gods of Whymsia come in two varieties: the Lords of Creation, and the Lesser Gods.

The Lords of Creation
The Lords of Creation are the five wellsprings from which the world...well, springs. They are as far beyond gods as gods are beyond sea kelp, and so take correspondingly less intrest in mortal affairs. Each rules over one of the five Planes of Alignment, and it is the dynamic interactions between their forces that bring about all the rest of creation. Though people respect the Five Lords, few truly worship them; the Lords are far beyond needing the faith of mere mortals to help them out.


 * Benedicta – Lady of Good, Incarnate of the Saccharine. Benedicta rules over the plane of Sacchrina. She can most often be found in the Woods of Celestial Harmony where all creatures love each other and show love and kindness to all beings. (If you walk through, you can hear the flowers occasionally burst into song while the cute wildlife dances.)


 * Bureaucron – Lord of Law, Automaton of Administration. Bureaucron is a sexless, ageless, faceless automaton patiently overseeing the gears of Administrata to keep Creation running. Some scholars suspect that Bureaucron actually is Administrata, instead of merely its caretaker.


 * Destructomaximus – Lord of Evil, Ruler of Nastiness, Incarnation of All That is Wrong in the World. "D.M.," as he prefers to be known (“Max” to his--very few--friends), is the ultimate avatar of pure Evil. He behaves very much like a mob boss (and dresses the part, too), lording over his Endless Night nightclub. Rumor has it he hosts a weekly poker game for the lesser gods, and there is great theological debate about which of them attend.


 * Ennui – Lord of Neutrality, Font of Apathy and Boredom. He sits forever in his celestial recliner and engages in the Great Pontifications. He has spent the past four hundred years contemplating the growth of the Endless Field (where the grass grows but an inch every century), and sages think he’s about due to switch to watching the paint peel from the Infinite Wall or dust fleck from the Boundless Rock. It is said that Ennui cares for nothing, and thus nothing can harm him. No one has ever managed to get his attention to see if this is correct.


 * Harpo – Lord of Chaos, Magnate of the Everchanging, Holder of the Purple Fish. No one’s really sure what Harpo's schtick is, because he keeps changing it. His plane of Locura is an ever-changing morass of chaotic stuff, and Harpo fits it perfectly. He never speaks, but you do get statements from him in the form of bicycle horns, mime, rains of frogs, or being turned into a purple walrus.

The Lesser Gods
The Lesser Gods are what most people actually think of when they talk about gods: powerful beings fueled by the worship of mortals and granting powers to their devoted followers. (And, incidentally, vulnerable to things like lack of worship or epic-level adventurers, though the clergy doesn't usually mention that.) There are between several hundred and several thousand of these gods, though most of them are not widely known in the world. The divisions below refer to where they're usually worshipped, not where they actually live. (That's generally Solaris.) Most of the following descriptions are short, though a few have been expanded for reference.

''Note: Players are actively encouraged to come up with their own gods to worship. The only guideline is that, being a comedy campaign, each of the gods has three "normal" domains and one odd one. Though the odd ones exist mostly for flavor, if a cleric or someone actually chooses one, we can work out the mechanics as needed.''

Greater Mundania

 * Ecsraxius - Ecsraxius is the god of evil and destruction. He delights in wanton carnage and self-serving chaos, and is pretty much the incarnations of all that is Evil, just not as much as Destructomaximus. (For which Ecsraxius is forever jealous). Ecsraxius does have one soft spot, however: puppies. He loves puppies, and anyone who harms one in his presence can expect swift retribution from the Lord of Wanton Death. His temple is guarded by heckhounds, which are the cutest little vehicles of destruction you’ll ever see. His holy symbol is a skull dripping blood and tears of the innocent while the terrified legions look on upon all that they love going up in flames and the avatars of death visit retribution upon the righteous and bring pain to all who would defy their will. (Full holy symbols require at least a tower shield to portray all this. Most people shorten it to a crying skull, which just makes him seem emo.)
 * Domains: Death, Destruction, Evil, Puppies


 * The Three Sisters - This trio of goddesses are widely respected in Greater Mundania, though there is a lot of rivalry between their clergy.
 * Destiny guides the life of heroes and adventurers. She is always blind and often drunk, capricious, and possibly insane. Of all the games the gods play, her favorite is pin-the-tail-on-the-unsuspecting-hero. Her holy symbol is a pair of dice strung together. Hopeful adventurers will often tie them to their saddle pommels in the hopes of gaining her favor. Experienced adventurers generally try to stay as far away from her influence as possible.
 * Domains: Chaos, Glory, Luck, Drunkenness
 * Rarask Umbaa (usually just called Rarask) is the goddess of the sun, light, bards, and cheerleaders. She is perky to the point of annoying, but always willing to lend a helping hand. Her holy symbol is a sun with a smiley face on it.
 * Domains: Community, Nobility, Sun, Sporting Events
 * Estradiol is a rabidly feminist/feminazi goddess whose holy symbol is also the female symbol. Only women may join her order, participate in services, etc. Men are “brute necessities” only useful for reproduction (and some followers get around that with short-term magical sex-change). She's one of the harsher goddesses, and no matter how many male adventurers may admire the clergy from afar, they always regret it when they get too close.
 * Domains: Liberation, Protection, Strength, Feminism


 * Dread Lord Yg’ygragax sits deep in the Underplanes, his thousand arms outstretched to cause chaos and destruction in his wake. Yg’ygragax is supposedly the first god, whose blind bagpiping brought the other gods into existence. (They left pretty quickly.) None dare to tread upon his domain, for even the mere sight of his dread visage can drive men mad (no save). His holy symbol is a shining black icosahedron.
 * Domains: Chaos, Luck, Madness, Snack Foods


 * Svela and Exaltus are the half-sibling gods of coolness and awesomeness, respectively. Both are frequently worshipped by adventurers, though they bestow true favor on very few. Svela prefers more subtle methods, while her brother-god is undeniably flashy. Many people worship them both, recognizing that there are times for composure and time for undeniable smackdown.
 * Domains (Svela): Darkness, Freedom, Luck, Coolness
 * Domains (Exaltus): Glory, Leadership, Luck, Awesomeness


 * Festalvus - God of parties, dance, and drinking.
 * Garav - God of Epic-level characters.
 * Ilyena the Eventually Omnipotent - Goddess of magic.
 * Jared Ploughpusher - God of commoners, classless NPCs, and chickens.
 * Minos the Faceless - God of minions, henchmen, and lackeys.
 * Nulos the Unfortunate - God of miserable failure.
 * Xanthoni - God of bad puns.

Emberglow
With the exception of the Great Machine, the gods of Emberglow are referred to as "Muses," the idea being that they inspire their followers more than direct them. Offerings are seen as more of polite thank-yous than as currying favor. (Though the latter certainly happens a lot, too.) Muses can be male or female.


 * Bartuk the Maimed - Muse of alchemy.
 * Bezalel the Heedless - Muse of golemsmithing, artificery, and Things Man Was Not Meant To Know
 * Frendal the Clever - Muse of mechanisms, gearworks, and intricate craftsmanship.
 * The Great Machine - The machine-god of Techgnostica, the Great and Incomprehensible Cogs.
 * Mystina the Questionably Wise - Muse of magic.
 * Volara of the Silver Wings - Muse of flight and inspiration.

Kratos

 * Falls-from-rocks - God of dumb luck.
 * The Great Wurm - God of dragons and lizardmen.
 * Melina Stonemelter - Goddess of magic and cunning.
 * Othar Stonecrusher - God of strength and foolhardiness.
 * Titanix the Great - God of giants.
 * Vipera - Goddess of the untamed jungle
 * Weiliss Everyoung - Goddess of youth, innocence, adorableness, and kittens.

Sparron

 * Baron Smedry - God of sea creatures
 * Captain Jack - Chief among the pirate gods, known mostly for his infinite capacity for rum. Oh, an he grants some spells, and stuff. (No, his last name is not "Sparrow.")
 * Dame of the Sea - Goddess of the sea. She has a proper name but is never referred to by it to avoid drawing her wrath, so few people actually know what it is.
 * Fair Sailin' - Goddess of wind
 * Lutin Morlute - God of treasure and ill-gotten gains.
 * Mate Care-For - God of luck

Wu-Shan
The pantheon of Wu-Shan works slightly differently than that of the other continents. Instead of several gods of roughly equal power, the Wu-Shan pantheon is a Heavenly Court with thousands of differentially ranked gods and godlings, ranging from the great Jade Empress all the way down to the "least gods" that are in charge of things like particular rivers or certain rocks. While one could certainly worship any of these, in practice the lesser ones are simply placated with offerings, while the major gods receive true worship. Some examples of the latter include:


 * Bento - God of meals.
 * Chan Yu - Godess of etiquette, ritual, and tea.
 * The Jade Empress - Ruler of Heaven and Earth, Lady of Ten Thousand Virtues, She of Infinite Wisdom and Grace, Keeper of the Sacred Wasabi of Immortality.
 * Kuhai - Goddess of the verse / Her meter ever flowing / All bow to her words.
 * Liang Shan-gua - God of tourism and souveneirs.
 * Noh Man - God of theater and arts.
 * Shu Do - Goddess of painting and calligraphy.
 * Sumo - God of earthquakes and thunder.
 * Xul Tze - God of kites.

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